Overheard on flight EZY8853

• "I started reading A Brief History of Time, but he lost me when it got to the sciencey bit."

• "If you want to watch our short programmes, just look at the screens overhead."

• "The weather [in Sharm el Sheikh] is... pretty much as you see it out the window."

The last, at least, was ironically. Sorry - purposefully ironic.