Wednesday, 1 October 2008

Re: Wisdom

Actually, compadre, I have no intention of questioning that evident truism. (The fact that you are a gay Commie peacenik is another issue entirely.)

My only concern is that so much of the world doesn't think that way.

i.e. It's OK to think "The real measure of my wealth is how much I'd be worth if I lost all my money," but what do (the dreaded) other people think about your penniless philosophy? I'm thinking, in particular, of:

a) Women
b) Other women
c) Richos
d) Other richos
e) Potential father-in-laws
f) Potential mother-in-laws
g) Bank managers
e) Bailiffs
f) Snoots
g) Stewardesses who treat you like crap because you can't afford to fly first class
h) All the people we knew in Oxford
i) Your public school bumchums
j) Our parents
k) Americans
l) The Swiss
m) Japanese tourists
n) People at tennis clubs
o) People at golf clubs
p) Your relations (at family reunions)
q) Your parents' friends (who love to quiz you on your loserdom)
r) Other writers
s) Merchant wankers
t) Girls
u) Other girls
v) Waiters who you can't afford to tip
w) Your comrades in the soup kitchen who find out you were educated at Oxford
x) The literary world
y) The entire world (except practioners of Jain)
z) Aliens

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