I'd turn for Giles Coren

Mum thinks you need 'a proper job'? Tell her The Times says otherwise...

"Believe me, the only man more benighted than the First Class Honours grad teaching ungrateful little toffs in a cabbage-smelling boarding school, with holes in his socks and dry rolls again for supper, knowing that he once turned down a job at Credit Suisse, is the money-rich banker with three Bentleys, six chins and two divorces who's forgotten how to read."